Wednesday, November 24, 2010

{Creating Relationship}

I have this stack of notebooks I keep. Unorganized. On one page you find my shop list of life's necessities on the next a poem or thought I've written down so I don't forget it. Rarely do any of these pages have dates. Just scribbles. Today I was going through one of my notebooks to find a clean page...I skip around too. I literally just open my notebooks and start writing. I don't use the pages in order. But anyway, this morning I found a page...with a date...who knows why I dated this page but I'm glad I did. Here's a little snippet from my life on 10.18.09. Me creating relationship with God. My written prayers...

Ready to move forward.
Ready to grow.
Today we begin.
Mission specified.
Journey unmapped.
Success inevitable.
Growth immeasurable.

It is time.
Move me.
Change me.
Make me more.

I also wrote this bit down the side of the page...

I feel a change today.
A shift in the wind.
Something new is stirring
and I breath it in.
The breath in my nostrils
gives me life.
From the stirring in my soul
springs fresh inspiration.
Desperate, I breath deeper.
It's been a while
since it smelled so sweet.
Felt this passionate.
Urged me this way.
What is it saying?
Which direction is it moving?
I must follow.
I must see it manifest.
Starting today.

a work in progress

And one last prayer...

Wind blown from the heavens
inspiration falls
stirring my soul
my hand will he hold.
I step lightly onto
fresh soil creating
a new footprint
where there was none before.
God guiding all the way
into horizons unseen.
Awe-filled I see him.
Is this really for me?
How is this abundance given for free?
Humbled in heart I begin
another step
Still, no path to be seen.
We're making our own,
God & me.

I love the way God will give us prayers. Give us the words we need to speak. The way we each have our own language with him that just the two of us understands. Even the pauses and silences have meaning and understanding between the two of us. The unspoken can be just as powerful as the spoken. This year I haven't had the words flow like this. It's been tears instead. I guess, after prayers like the ones above and opening the door for growth, one must endure the growing pains. I've had, we as a family have had, some pretty harsh growing pains this year. God carrying us each step of the way. I must say though - finding these written prayers and now having the hindsight of the year - I am excited to move into 2011. I'm excited to move past the growing pains and into the new experiences of having grown - in my heart, in my kindness, in my giving, in my art, as a wife, as a mother, in my knowledge of Christ.

Each year I always pray for a new scripture. 2009 was Ephesians 3:20. 2010 was the same scripture with the tagline of "Live Audaciously" added. It's not yet the new year and it's a little earlier than I generally seem to recieve my annual scriptures, but God has spoken. Though I never know how these scriptures will play out in the day-to-day it always excites me to receive them, especially when, they are of this nature.

23 “Truly I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain,
‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’
 and does not doubt in their heart
but believes that what
they say will happen,
it will be done for them.

24 Therefore I tell you,
whatever you ask for in prayer,
 believe that you have received it,
and it will be yours.

Mark 11:23-24

~Our Impossibles are God's Opportunities~

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Thanks for summing it up so well. I think I’ll be returning here often. Best Regards.